I dont believe that there's a thing called super true friendship where u never lie, never hurt each other, never make anyone cry, never this n never that. pure perfection. i dont believe it exist. if u do and u r experiencing it..by all means..CONGRATULATIONS! cos u might be the ONLY one who enjoy that gift.
I have had a good share of friendships since I ever started understanding words, actions and feelings. And to tell you the truth, I'm gifted with a handful of wonderful true friends. By wonderful, i dont mean perfection. and by true, i dont mean tear-less. I have 3 wonderful bestfriends. And to get to this stage wasnt an easy ride either. Ah la..u know kids...will definitely have misunderstanding here and there..arh..those normal stuff. I went through that phase with Aze and Ita. By all means I never regreted any of it cos it just strenghten our friendship even more! As for Eeleng, it was a bit different cos I met her while in uni. By then I was a lil more matured, so there wasnt any major misunderstanding and what not.
I'm 23 now. I consider maself kindda somewhat an adult la kan. Yer la..I'm already earning ma own moneh, have ma own place to live in, a car, a guy.. Kalu masih ingat a small kid melampau la tuh :P. As an adult, you gotta act and think as one too, am I right?
What dissappoint me is that, my general perception that my friends who are averagely around my age will be somewhat with the same maturity as I am. How i am so wrong about that.
Past are meant to be in the past. If you dwell with it too much, you'll never be able to move on. If i had kept tight to all the small lil misunderstandings i had with all my friends..ill never be good friends with anyone right now. You forgive and forget..but at the same time learn from it and escape from repeating the same mistake again.
Running away from viewing the bad/ugly side of yourself is not that healthy either. Yeah when we look into the mirror..we want to look our best. We wanna look at angles that's flattering. But that doesnt mean u should just throw away the attn needed by the ugly side of yourself. You still gotta look at it. What can you do about that scar on your left cheek? cover up or proper medication? If u just ignore it..it might just get worst. it might even be permanent! It's the same with us. None of us are perfect, so if you know you have weaknesses, work on improving it. not RUN AWAY from it. that is NEVER a solution, my friend.
I happened to get tangled in a ..what I call a no-title-misunderstanding. I had a small Raya gathering and I invited some friends over. My bestfriend from Penang came all the way just to join this yearly occasion. Everything was goin well. I was freakingly tired from the preparation ofcourse, but it was all worth it. Until I realised the next day that a friend who attended wasnt happy with me because I happened to not inform him that his ex will be in presence of my gathering. I thought since all my friends have GROWN UP and are ADULTS...no such misunderstandings will occur. How i was wrong.
Fine, maybe it was my mistake to have not informed. Then again it wasnt on purpose. If u have had prepared/organized a gathering on your own..with ur 2 bare hands..with very minimal help, u will know that the priority at the end of the day is to prepare for the food n such.
Actually, I did make a list a few days before, but I just never thought that inviting the exes will cause such commotion. His ex seems fine and moved on and totally fine with his presence. But that wasnt the case for him.
When you can't handle a situation you are in, pause and think, what went wrong. Do not just place blames on other ppl. It was you who couldn't handle the situation. It was you who felt uncomfortable for God knows what ever reason. You do not need to throw judgement and accusation on other people. You would rather throw away a friendship due to your ego and own weakness of self-control? Too bad for you.
What I'm trying to say here is that, never take forgranted of your friends..especially when they are your bestest friends! Sometimes you don;'t think before you speak with em just bcos u think ull never lose them and they will be ok with it. People have feelings. Just because they've been sticking with you the whole time, doesnt mean they will tomorrow. Friendships are like plants. You have to water em, feed em..get em enough sun...then they will grow. Don't expect to have a healthy plant by just watering it once every 3 months and go around telling "i have a rare plant at home". It doesnt work that way.
So is there such thing as true friendship. I think so. But it's up to you to define it. You can either be a liar to live in a "true friendship" or accept the reality in a true friendship. Your call, mate
I have had a good share of friendships since I ever started understanding words, actions and feelings. And to tell you the truth, I'm gifted with a handful of wonderful true friends. By wonderful, i dont mean perfection. and by true, i dont mean tear-less. I have 3 wonderful bestfriends. And to get to this stage wasnt an easy ride either. Ah la..u know kids...will definitely have misunderstanding here and there..arh..those normal stuff. I went through that phase with Aze and Ita. By all means I never regreted any of it cos it just strenghten our friendship even more! As for Eeleng, it was a bit different cos I met her while in uni. By then I was a lil more matured, so there wasnt any major misunderstanding and what not.
I'm 23 now. I consider maself kindda somewhat an adult la kan. Yer la..I'm already earning ma own moneh, have ma own place to live in, a car, a guy.. Kalu masih ingat a small kid melampau la tuh :P. As an adult, you gotta act and think as one too, am I right?
What dissappoint me is that, my general perception that my friends who are averagely around my age will be somewhat with the same maturity as I am. How i am so wrong about that.
Past are meant to be in the past. If you dwell with it too much, you'll never be able to move on. If i had kept tight to all the small lil misunderstandings i had with all my friends..ill never be good friends with anyone right now. You forgive and forget..but at the same time learn from it and escape from repeating the same mistake again.
Running away from viewing the bad/ugly side of yourself is not that healthy either. Yeah when we look into the mirror..we want to look our best. We wanna look at angles that's flattering. But that doesnt mean u should just throw away the attn needed by the ugly side of yourself. You still gotta look at it. What can you do about that scar on your left cheek? cover up or proper medication? If u just ignore it..it might just get worst. it might even be permanent! It's the same with us. None of us are perfect, so if you know you have weaknesses, work on improving it. not RUN AWAY from it. that is NEVER a solution, my friend.
I happened to get tangled in a ..what I call a no-title-misunderstanding. I had a small Raya gathering and I invited some friends over. My bestfriend from Penang came all the way just to join this yearly occasion. Everything was goin well. I was freakingly tired from the preparation ofcourse, but it was all worth it. Until I realised the next day that a friend who attended wasnt happy with me because I happened to not inform him that his ex will be in presence of my gathering. I thought since all my friends have GROWN UP and are ADULTS...no such misunderstandings will occur. How i was wrong.
Fine, maybe it was my mistake to have not informed. Then again it wasnt on purpose. If u have had prepared/organized a gathering on your own..with ur 2 bare hands..with very minimal help, u will know that the priority at the end of the day is to prepare for the food n such.
Actually, I did make a list a few days before, but I just never thought that inviting the exes will cause such commotion. His ex seems fine and moved on and totally fine with his presence. But that wasnt the case for him.
When you can't handle a situation you are in, pause and think, what went wrong. Do not just place blames on other ppl. It was you who couldn't handle the situation. It was you who felt uncomfortable for God knows what ever reason. You do not need to throw judgement and accusation on other people. You would rather throw away a friendship due to your ego and own weakness of self-control? Too bad for you.
What I'm trying to say here is that, never take forgranted of your friends..especially when they are your bestest friends! Sometimes you don;'t think before you speak with em just bcos u think ull never lose them and they will be ok with it. People have feelings. Just because they've been sticking with you the whole time, doesnt mean they will tomorrow. Friendships are like plants. You have to water em, feed em..get em enough sun...then they will grow. Don't expect to have a healthy plant by just watering it once every 3 months and go around telling "i have a rare plant at home". It doesnt work that way.
So is there such thing as true friendship. I think so. But it's up to you to define it. You can either be a liar to live in a "true friendship" or accept the reality in a true friendship. Your call, mate
